Squirmy McSquirm…

Today I took Richie and Avery along while I had my hair done. As most any girl can tell you, having your hair done is a very important day of the month in which you convey your deepest hair desires to your trusted stylist and then sit back for 90 minutes and pray that it all works out in the end. The kids usually go with me and take along their toys. Today was no exception. Except, unlike usual, Richie felt he needed to use my lap as a springboard for all of his activities about the salon. He repeatedly shimmied up onto my lap setting off a choking-hacking sound from me as the cape momentarily cut off my oxygen. Seconds later, he would bound down off to his next adventure which could have been any number of truly important and potentially embarrassing things such as: pilfering through the drawers at the register desk (trying to find the suckers), asking all of the stylists where the trash can was all the while with his chewed up orange gum on the end of his finger, throwing his puzzle pieces underneath the coffee table to see how far they'd slide on the wood floor, asking the stylist for a drink (which he graciously received in the form of a tiny water bottle), and of course singing Hey There Delilah at the top of his lungs when it came on over the sound system…."Ohhhh it's whatcha do da meeeeeee"….can you hear it? I'll say the worst of it was when I moved over for the ever delicate waxing portion of my session. It was then as I laid back in the chair having hot wax rubbed on my forehead and having unruly eyebrow hairs ripped out from my face that Squirmy McSquirm decided to make his boldest move of the day climbing up over the arm of the chair, getting his foot stuck, screaming until I released him without being able to look and then plopped up on my chest and planted a big wet kiss on my chin. I don't know if you've ever been kissed while having your eyebrows waxed….it's kinda hard to concentrate on the moment. But, I'll take 'em when I can get 'em, I suppose!

Nighttime buddies

Richie has always been one to like things just so-so. His shoes must be double-knotted and the laces must be pointing down otherwise his legs mysteriously stop working. His VeggieTales pillow must be turned with the veggie crew facing up or else he cannot lie down. He never wants a coat regardless of the temperature. He can only ride in the RED booster seat. All the others send him into fits of tears.

However, his list of bedtime needs is getting a little out of control. It used to be just that his veggie pillow was properly adjusted and his Thomas the Train blanket was laid out over him head to toe. No more. In the last few weeks, it's become a bit more intense. The list of MUST HAVE items before he can sleep has grown to include the following:

• 1 VeggieTales pillow
  
• 1 Thomas the Train blanket
  
• 2 blue pillows from the couch downstairs
  
• 1 white family blanket—note: the white blanket must be put on FIRST before the Thomas blanket
  
• 1 Humpkin (Richie's fluffy dog)
  
• 1 pink kitty cat (indefinitely borrowed from Big Sis)
  
• 1 small pink Care Bear (also borrowed from Big Sis)
  
• 1 Lamby (Richie's lamb)
  
• 1 red monkey (Valentines gift from Nana)
  

Last night, he got up at 3:30am to potty. Of course, after relieving himself he could not possibly be expected to return to his own bed. He HAD to come to Mommy and Daddy's bed. I laid there for what must have been 7 minutes and 5 round trips as he dragged every single one of his items into my room and piled them into our bed. After which, he plopped himself right in the middle of us and snoozed away.

Whatever happened to just a simple security blanket?

At the mall with my little buddy…

Yesterday, I took one of my favorite people to the mall with me. Carson joined me for a little trip so that I could take back a pair of shoes I picked up on Spa Day because I decided they were too small. My little partner was quite patient with me as I browsed the sale racks at Dillard's for a bit. For the most part, it was a quiet afternoon. I would ask for his opinion now and then about certain items and he would oblige me to give a "yeah" or "nay." I did pick up a little sale item while we were there and as we were checking out, the sales lady and another older shopper were commenting to each other about how cute Carson was. His eyes, his outfit, his sweet demeanor. I didn't argue. He often receives small praises from strangers like this and I never counter and I never brag. I only agree that he is quite wonderful and leave it at that. But, usually my heart is bursting with pride.

Leaving Dillard's he spotted the gumball station and asked for some money. I didn't have any quarters, so we stopped in J.C. Penney where I changed out a dollar bill. He grabbed the four quarters and I'm sure they were burning a hole in his pocket for the next 20 minutes. It made me happy to provide so much anticipation for him. We made the stop for the shoes and were coming out of American Eagle when we walked right up on a posse of teenage boys who desperately needed their mamas. Their pants were saggy, their hair was greasy, they were rowdy and they all had earphones in. I flashed to the future for a split second and said a prayer that my baby boy would be protected during his teen years. That his heart would stay safe. That his choices would be sound. That his love for God would increase. As we passed the posse, Carson tenderly slipped his little hand inside mine. I nearly melted right there. We proceeded quietly back to the gumball stand his left hand in mine and his right clutching his quarters.

I know the time is coming when he'll no longer hold my hand and quarters and gumballs won't be the highlight of his days. I just pray that even when that time is here he'll remember our sweet times together and that perhaps he'll have a little one of his own who melts his heart the way he does mine.

How NOT to make your girlfriends like you…

If you're looking for a clever way to lose a girlfriend, I might suggest the following.

Spend Super Bowl Sunday evening lounging on her couch while your kids riot around for three hours eating all her food and dumping crayons and Polly Pockets all over the house. Let your husband jump and yell and fly toward the flat panel television every time there is a good play. Bring a bowl of queso to share and be sure to nuke it about twelve times so that when it's time to do dishes, the queso has become hard as a rock and glues itself to the bowl…then, let your girlfriend wash it. Stay at your girlfriend's house until way past everyone's bedtime and honor her request not to clean up the Polly Pocket explosion. In your mad dash out at 9:30pm, leave your purse (wallet and phone) behind in her coat closet.

THEN!!!!!!!

Next morning, make sure your gas tank is on empty. Then, empty it completely by driving your son to school. Basically, get your self into a situation where you have no phone, no gas, and no money so that you are forced to stop by unannounced at your girlfriend's house at 8:30am.

As you approach, you'll probably feel a bit better knowing that she is at least awake, because you'll see Wow Wow Wubsy going on the TV inside. Ring the bell with confidence.

Wait 2 minutes. When nothing happens, but you can still see Wubsy, ring again.

Wait 2 more minutes. Get desperate and start peering through the beveled glass doorway. When you spot her kids sitting blissfully in front of Wubsy, start waving your arms and yelling sweet stuff like…"Hey, get your mom!" "Open the door, it's MISS CHRISTIE!" "Let me in!" The children will have been told to ignore the bell and let the "FedEx man" leave the package because heaven knows that ONLY the FedEx man would dare to ring the bell at such an hour.

When the small one starts laughing and waving his stick sling shot at you from his comfy spot on the couch, just take a deep breath. He is simply being an obedient child. Even if it had been 9 degrees outside, he has the strength of character to leave you there in honored obedience to his mother.

Ring the door bell again. This time, older sis will spot you and run to get your girlfriend. Thankfully.

When your girlfriend answers the door, apologize profusely. Say nothing of the state in which she answered the door. After all , it is 8:30am, you kept her up late and now you are rudely unannounced. Find your purse and then…

Run!

And, on the way home thank the Lord above that no matter how hard you try to really irritate some friends, they still manage to love you anyway.

Spa day…

I have the best husband. Yesterday he arranged for me and one of my best friends to have the day out together. This was his Valentine's Day present for me and it was incredible. No, it's not strange that I spent my V-tines Day gift with my girlfriend and not with HIM. We're very secure like that.

My friend Volare and I spent the first glorious free hours shopping at the mall for what we're anticipating to be a FABULOUS upcoming TRIP (more on that later). It was a bit of a whirlwind because two girls cannot really be limited to two hours to shop for an entire trip without there being some mad dashing! I was wishing I had a pair of those wheely shoes the kids wear these days so I could speed around the mall just a wee bit faster. That was, until I saw a kid literally wheel himself right into a post in the middle of the mall and fall down. Painful AND embarrassing….the worst combo.

Volare and I also lunch had lunch together complete with totally grown-up food and conversation and then spent three whole hours being pampered at the spa. Oh, yes….we were pampered. We had the sea spa pedicure, the facial, the aromatherapy bath and massages. You'd think after all that beauty treatment that we'd have walked out of there….well….beautiful. However, after having all our makeup removed, our bodies rubbed hither and yon, spending 30 minutes in a hot tub and having a guy rub massage oil in our hair we were certainly not about to hit the runway. We felt like a couple of wet noodles. Very, very relaxed noodles.

We left there and went to Volare's house where Rich and Ryan had prepared steak dinner with all the fixin's and there was plenty of Godiva chocolate to go around.

It was a SUPERB Valentine's Day gift. Now, I have an entire year to speculate on how my sweetie will try to top it next year. Or, why wait until next year? My birthday is coming up pretty soon! J