We may have a problem on our hands. I think my son may be addicted to...are you ready for it?....Juicy Fruit gum. It would seem that not only does he love it dearly and ask for it 10 times a day, he'll now throw a kicking, screaming fit when denied. It goes a little something like this:
R: Mom, can I have some Juicy Fruit? Please? Can I? Can I? (Picture a sweet, soft little three-year-old with large pleading eyes, two inches from my face.)
Me: Sweetie, we don't have any gum.
R: Yes we do!
Me: No we don't.
R: (beginning to rifle through my purse) YES! WE! DO!
Me: (with stern, convincing…or maybe not so…mommy face) No, we, don't. I need my purse back please.
R: NO! I NEED GUM!
Me: No you don't.
R: YES I DO.
Me: How about some candy?
R: NO, I NEED GUM. WHHHHAAAAAHHHH. WWWHHHAAAAAAHH. WWWWHAAA. I NEED IT. I NEED GUM!!!!!!
All this while at the eye doctor's office today where I really just needed 45 minutes of peace so that I could get all set up to, you know, SEE for all of 2008. But, he didn't get that, I guess. He would rather have me forego good sight and instead spend my 45 minutes magically producing Juicy Fruit out of the sky. What does he think "we don't have any" means??????? We don't have any. I can't get any. They eye doctor doesn't sell any. You're nuts if you think I'm taking you to Wal Mart to get any while you're raving mad. Even if I could get any, your attitude is SO BAD that you have lost your gum privileges. FOR ALL OF 2008!
I've tried switching to mint gum. No go. It's too "hot." I've tried switching to somewhat fruity tasting sugar-free gum. No go. He spits it out like I've just asked him to eat a worm. The only suitable substitute in the case that the beloved Juicy Fruit is unavailable would be the orange Trident. Sadly, we hadn't a lick of that today either.
I started picturing myself alone with him in a video supervised, locked, all white room with rubber walls while he kicks and flails about the bed coming off of his sugar high which had been induced by Juicy Fruit gum. Can anything be done? Perhaps an intervention is in order. Or maybe we should just go cold turkey. No gum in the house. Oh, sweet. That'll be a real treat.
1 comment:
hee, hee, hee...
We should really get our boys together. They could relate. I am stuck in the perpetual loop of the "Why?" question. So I try to produce a plausible answer...which just gives way to another why.
"Why is Superman not real?"
I finally just admit, "I don't know."
"Why?" (for the 22nd time in a row)
"Because Mommy's just not that smart."
"Why?"
Funny how inferior it can make you feel that you can't snap your fingers to produce PB&J and you don't know the answers to even half of life's big questions. :)
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